Healing

During many long discussions with respondents, mental health care providers, and community volunteers, it has become clear that good mental health and wellbeing mean different things to different people and each person has to find ways that make life meaningful and satisfying for them. Each journey towards that end is unique, though each will inevitably involve blockages, dead ends, and long roads as well as level grounds, open paths and clear skies. People who participated in this oral history project made the following observations and suggestions to anyone wishing to improve their own mental health and wellbeing.

• Spend quality time with close friends and loved ones, even if you do not feel like talking, stay around people who care about you. If you can, talk to them about your experiences, your worries, your fears, and your hopes. Be there for them, too. Knowing that you are not alone can be enormously beneficial.
• Find work or activities that are meaningful to you, that can provide focus and a sense of purpose. Joining a local community group can help, somewhere where you can learn new skills, such as painting, singing, knitting, or a foreign language; something which can provide a sense of pride and achievement.
• Spend time doing a hobby, such as gardening, playing sport, cooking, swimming, or arts and crafts, or get involved with a walking or yoga group. Perhaps take up a martial art or boxing.
• Give time to other people by volunteering, or care for animals. There are plenty of organisations that need help, sometimes on a regular basis, sometimes just once in a while. You just have to find the right one for you, one that interests you, that you find satisfying, that introduces you to new people and new experiences, or that allows you to work in a small, dedicated group if that is what you need.
• Having someone to talk to can provide much needed and timely support and reassurance. Joining a trauma recovery or self-help group can help significantly. This may seem daunting at first, and you may need someone to help you take that first step, but once you have introduced yourself to a group, the process becomes easier and can make a huge difference to your mental health and overall wellbeing.
• Try to eat a healthy, balanced diet, as it will make you feel calmer, give you energy, and regulate your blood sugar levels. Eating plenty of fruit and vegetables will make you feel healthier. Avoid alcohol and other drugs as they can worsen the symptoms of mental ill-health. And avoid caffeine after lunch time to allow you to sleep well at night.
• Getting enough sleep helps to relieve tension and lessen stress and worry. Have a good bedtime routine where you wind down before getting into bed – have a glass of milk of a cup of herbal tea, and relax with calming music or a good book. Go to bed at the same time each night and try to get around eight hours sleep.
• Practice mindfulness techniques, which can help to manage anxiety and negative thoughts, as well as teach us how to be happier and calmer during the ups and downs of life. Mindfulness can involve breathing, movement, and relaxation techniques, and can be practised alone or with others.
• Experience new things, such as trying different foods, travelling, or meeting new people.
• Get help when needed – do not wait! Visit your GP if you have any physical or mental health concerns. Talk to friends, loved ones, or people at your local self-help group if you are struggling or feel unwell.
• Set realistic goals for yourself. These can help to create a regular routine and structure in your life and improve your ability to organise your time, as well as giving you a purpose in life. These goals might relate to exercise, healthy eating, study, work, a hobby, or joining in social activities.

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Oral testimonies - Healing

The likes of when my Mum and Dad passed. I got support from EDAMH (East Dunbartonshire Association for Mental Health) they recommended I spoke to the people at GRACE, you know. And even the job centre; just getting in contact with them. Everything’s been great since then, you know. Met a lot of new friends, socially, going places, you know, different areas; which has helped a lot, so…Well, likes of the computer class, you know. I’ve kind of learned a bit but I would like to learn more. But as I say, again, sight issues, yeah. So, when I’m on my laptop I can’t see it. Even though you can get the accessibility thing on it. You know, to make the text bigger or whatever…I think it brings a more positive outlook (GRACE) to what I’ve been going through, you know.

- Ricky A

I think there’s more the one positive effect GRACE has had in various areas. For one, it’s gave me a safe space to be who I am on that day. Because I’m quite a person that I’m used to hiding things and not admitting when I’m really struggling. Whereas if I come into GRACE, I didn’t have to say I was struggling but I didn’t have to put on this fake smile and pretend that everything was ok. So, that was really good for me. It was my outlet. Also, I would be quite isolated without GRACE. Like, I wouldn’t really see many people. I know I have a few friends but people have a lot on and I don’t really get to see people that often. And they’re kind of like a family to me. And also…It was also a sense of purpose as well. Because taking part in these activities really helped me. And it gave me something…A reason to get up in the morning. Something to, you know, at times look forward to. And it’s not always doom and gloom at GRACE. We always have a laugh and that can be a good medicine as well. You know.

- Amanda

I think, the fact is, you can more or less clear your head (walking). You know, you’re concentrating…you’re focusing on where you’re going. And it more or less brings your mood up as well. I do my solo walks as well but other than that it’s mostly the group walks. I think it’s the social aspect. Cause, you’ve got someone to speak to as you’re walking. Whereas, on your own I’ve just got the headphones on listening to music (laughs). I try to be resilient, in what it is, you know. As I say, the walking helps. So, you can put that out of your mind as well. And then when I listen to music it takes you into a whole different world so…

- Ricky A

Well, I could be cynical here and say yes (to-Is there a cure for mental illness?). If people were more open to listening to people. And knowing exactly what was causing the problem in the first place. I could be…I could write you out a cheque for five thousand pounds and that’s your worries over. Because you’re maybe sitting there worrying about financial problems. How you’re going to pay your bills. How you’re going to pay your energy bills. So, that’s your mental health problem would be over. But it’s about people sitting listening to what actually is causing that person to be in that turmoil in the first place. Whether it could be about bereavement or you know the loss of a job or the loss of a house. I don’t think drugs are the answer, I definitely don’t think drugs is the answer. I definitely think it’s about allowing people the time to sit and talk about what their problems really are. I mean you can’t even get hold of a GP just now. And I know from personal experience from going to see my own GP. I could be there and my GP hasn’t even given me eye contact because he’s busy looking at his computer screen. And I think that sort of thing should change. Because if the GP can’t look at you how worthless are you going to feel. I’s as if I’m not even worthy of him looking at me. Because it’s only when you look at somebody that you maybe get the full picture. Because that patient that’s sitting in that surgery could be sitting with tears in their eyes or their lip trembling ready to cry. And if that doctor is looking at his screen, he’s not seeing that.

- Catherine Buchanan

Like I said, I’ve been introverted for most of my adult life. Well, most of my life. So, I was never one…If you were having a meeting, I’d be the one sitting in the corner. Keeping quiet. Letting everybody else talk. Now, I don’t mind putting in my…I went to The Foundry in Kirkintilloch and they hold sessions. It’s the SMART (Stress Management and Resiliency Training) sessions. This is very helpful because it gets you to open up and talk about things. And share your experience with other people who have gone through similar things. And that’s really, really good. And that’s what’s good about GRACE because you’ll always find somebody who’s had similar if not exactly the same experiences as you’ve had. Like I say, when I saw that…When I heard that girl in the AA (Alcoholics Anonymous)…It wasn’t exactly what I went through but it was enough for me to identify with. And realise, that’s why I’m so angry all the time. And I have to get that anger out.

- David C

Yes, I’ve seen…I don’t know much about GRACE but I’ve seen other organisations, other groups that are completely inclusive for folk. Where people can be what they are. They need to be what they are. And they get on they’re not judged for what they are. They go on and they can be part of something. They feel valued. You know like they’ve got somewhere to go. Something to do. People they can identify with. It’s taking it that step further. That’s where society lets people like that down because they become part of a group-Oh, there’s the manic-depressive walking group. It should be a walking group with people that might have had manic depression in the past. But that’s not how you identify. You’re not identified by their condition. We shouldn’t be identifying people by-Oh, he’s doing that because he is…No. he’s doing that because this is where he is with his life just now. We work with him. We move on from there.

- James Calgie

And then we (NHS Restart writers’ group) were part of The Merchant City Festival this year. Which was a play that we’d written, or our writings had influenced it for John to write it. And that was phenomenal because it was proper, real, paid Equity actors acting. And it had been our writing. And you could see where the characters had come from. We had a part in it. You know, we were like this…It was set in the Ramshorn Cemetery and we were the ghost chorus. But, it had all been our, kind of, stuff. And that was, that was quite profound. Cause, I thought…Of course he’s doing his job. But I thought - Isn’t he nice, Isn’t he pleasant. So, kind to us all. But, no, no. It was true. We did actually do a lot of the work which allowed him to then go and write it with NHS Restart and also a writers’ group. An elderly writers’ group in Castlemilk. So, again, this was through Glasgow Life. And then we were at The Merchant City Festival for the few days that was on for that whole week. And that was great. And what was also good about that was there was six of us from Restart and, again, John was very good at encompassing everybody. So, even if you didn’t want to be in it you were still…You know, you came along. But some of those conversations that happened outwith of that about recovery or about getting to know people a little bit more. That…It was really powerful. It was really special. Cause all what…I think, most of us that are within that group, all we want is for everyone to get well and stay well. You know, we’re not interested in any of the dynamics other than- this is what we’re here for. And we’ve all got a responsibility towards that.

- Jill CC

I remember going for my first time (to GRACE) and I think it was the drama class that I went into. I remember thinking it looked quite a friendly place. It was a bit.. It was quite like intimidating at first. Just, I suppose, with everyone there. But I think once I got to know people…Everyone, you know, everyone was friendly and nice so…Yeah, I began to like it and stuff.

- Ewan

Yeah, I wouldn’t be where I am now without GRACE. GRACE gave me that confidence. That boost. And communication skills that I use every day now. Would I have come so far without GRACE? No. I would have improved but I wouldn’t have improved as much and as quickly as I did. So, GRACE…You don’t think GRACE makes that much difference until you go through the different stages that I went through with confidence building and helping others and meeting new people. GRACE gives you that base, that core to build on. So, you have your core of your individualism. Your…your perspective. And then if you add GRACE, you get different avenues to pursue. And whether that be art or it could be digital. And you grow by meeting different people and then your horizon expands.

- David Glasgow

It’s a fantastic... (Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing) I mean from what I understand really it’s your…the limbic brain which is where these really submerged memories are that are triggered by smells and tastes and touch and things. And basically, you then are talking through…You’re being prompted to talk about what’s coming through your mind. And I can remember at the time thinking I have no control of what’s coming out of my head here (laughs) because I hadn’t realised a lot of the stuff. You recorded the sessions so that you could go back and listen to them. And I never did. Because I just didn’t want to. But after nine months. Huge, huge differences. As I said I stopped having nightmares. Stopped having…being triggered by a lot of the things that used to trigger me and it really was very successful. And the other side of that having done that my lovely community psychiatrist, who practiced very holistically, got me in touch with the community occupational therapist. Who was…who worked for the mental health team. And he basically prescribed getting up into the hills and walking. And also got me to do an initial eight-week mindful based stress reduction course. And I still practice mindfulness every day of my life and that has helped enormously. To allow me to look at life from a very different viewpoint. And to basically manage enjoying today and not letting yesterday damage how I feel and not worrying too much about the future. So this living in the moment with mindfulness has been a revolution. And it’s really. It’s literally kept me sane. To the extent that they’d put me on Lithium when I was diagnosed, but after three years of having the EMDR and the mindfulness I was able to come off the drugs. So I’m actually on no drugs at all for my mental health now.

- Kate

The anti-depressant tablets were quite helpful. Because I noticed a difference almost straight away. I wasn’t on the right ones so I had to try a couple of them. But they quietened my mind enough so that I could focus on what I needed to do. So, I mean a lot of people…I had friends saying to me-‘oh yes, I was prescribed anti-depressants but I didn’t take them I just decided to do it for myself’ Well, good for you. But folk shouldn’t say that because some people need…If you’ve got a chemical imbalance in your brain it needs to be balanced by medication. Full stop.

- Lynnie

GRACE has definitely got me to the point where I am. It built my confidence up in so many different ways that I wouldn’t have thought. Joining in with drama. I didn’t want to do that. Joining in with other things I just thought-No. But that is what…taking that step I think is the…And, actually the realisation going to GRACE gave me was that it’s only me that can fix me. I need support like anybody but I relied too much for a long time or expected the services to make me better. I relied on my CPN (Community Psychiatric Nurse) looking back too much. And when I came to GRACE, I didn’t need them as much. I was discharged from my CPN. I didn’t need her anymore. And for anybody else, I think, it is just taking that first step. Taking responsibility for your recovery, for your journey. Nobody else can do it. We need to help each other we definitely do. We need support. And asking for support I find easy now. Before I would feel, ‘Oh, you need to do this yourself.’ But, that’s been a big learning curve from GRACE, is being able to ask for support. There’s no…In fact it’s braver to ask for support than to struggle on not coping.

- Maggie

I’m content. There’s days where it’s not so great. Because it doesn’t matter what kind of thinking you’ve got. You can’t stop life. You know, things still happen. But It’s… I realise that it’s how I react to them. I can’t stop things happening outside of me. Life continues. And that is it. We’ve got to deal with…We want everything to be the same. And that’s just not life. It’s constantly changing. The only thing that we can be sure of is change. And It’s how I react to it. Sometimes I don’t react very well to it. And then I say to myself-but I’m still human. But I know. Ok am…If I keep going the way that I am in my thinking then I won’t go back there. I’ve got tools that I can use to say…maybe sometimes-ok I’m feeling down today. Just sit with that. You know. Don’t fight it. You’re human and these are emotions. There not me they’re emotions. And I know it will pass. And I just have to kind of stick with that kind of thinking, I think. And I’ll be ok. There’s some days that I can reminisce and wish that I’d done things different. But then I can draw myself back. What I’m saying is I’m still human. You know and I’m not perfect (laughs).

- Liz McVey

Listen to people. Tell the truth. Follow through on what you say. Tell people that the most important thing is that they are happy and that’s what the outcome is. And that most things can be sorted. It’s simple. It’s not complicated. You know. It’s just other people make it complicated and systems make it complicated. It’s basically as simple as that. What are we doing here today? We’re here because we’re trying to make you happy. Find a way for you to be happy and that’s it.-‘Oh I thought we were here to sort out my budget?’ ‘Well, if we do that we might make you happy. That’s our ultimate goal.’ That’s all. I think that’s it.

- David A Allan

I suppose just taking one day at a time (with grief). And knowing that one day maybe five minutes in that day it’s going to be good. And the next week it’s going to be ten minutes in that day. And also getting the right help. Having the right people around you. And not to take medication. Not to take any kind. Cause the medication doesn’t help you. I don’t think it would do anything to help you. At the end of the day, you still have to face what’s happened. And all you’re doing is putting it off. And also, I think the other message is. Nurture yourself. Look after yourself. Go and take yoga. Go and do meditation. Do things that make you feel good. And don’t blame yourself. And appreciate the positives that have come out of it. That you have learnt how to deal with an incredibly difficult situation. And therefore you’ll be able to understand if it happens to somebody else. You’ve got an insight. Yeah, that’s about it. And take up gardening. It’s always good. Gardening and walking. Get you out in the fresh air. Get you out and seeing the way the world is. And just believe. Have a positive attitude that the world is not as bad as everybody makes it look. There’s a lot of good people in the world. There’s a lot of good things happen in the world. You just have to find them. And I suppose look at your…what you put into your body. What you physically put into your body means quite a lot. Whether it’s over eating or whether it’s alcohol. And also, what you put in your mind is much more important. If you sit and watch the BBC news. You’ll get depressed in no time at all. So, it’s about saying to yourself- What am I going to put in my mind? Look at nice things. If you have a religion, fall back on that. Just believe the world’s going to be a lot better and there’s good people. Good people. Just find them. But you don’t hear about them because all you hear about is negative stuff in the news. So, I suppose, go and get some good books. Read nice books and poetry. Read nice things. Go and watch good movies. Anything that makes you feel good. So, be careful what you put in your body. Be careful what you put in your mind.

- Mary Smith

I was going for walks at Stobhill (hospital)l. And I knew that area like the back of my hand because my cousins stayed in Menzies in Balornock, which was near the old driving school in Springburn. So, I knew that whole place. So, I used to go for long walks all round about. Getting my head all round about it. Which I thought that helped me. It might not help a lot of people but it helped me. Walking about getting my own thoughts and not telling them to anyone. No sitting in a one to one or a two to one or whatever. That helped me. And, as I said, it’s helped us through for going forward. And if there’s a problem just me my daughter and my son, my youngest son, we just talk it over. And I think that’s a great thing. Because if you can’t talk to your kids who else can you really talk to. You know. And it’s good.

- Stewart Tait

Yes, I think GRACE is quite good. Cause, like, that time through the pandemic and what have you we had nowhere to go. Nobody to tell the thingummy because you couldn’t see anybody or whatever. It was good when Robert and Rikki came up with the idea of doing it through Zoom on the laptops. It was good. We were all in each other’s house and what have you. Having fun playing games and what have you. But, yeah, I think…But, if it wasn’t for doing the Zoom I don’t think any of us know where we would actually be. Because it was just like we never left. Like even although everything was all shut down and what have you. We did the Zoom. We were all in each other’s houses and what have you. And I think that helped quite a lot of people.

- Angela Duncan

Coping mechanisms… Well, I now have this little wee dog, who is great. She’s not actually my dog. I have her through the week because my daughter is working. But, she has been a god send. I got her to look after, after I had lost Peter. So, I think I just poured all my love into this wee dog. So, that’s one of my coping mechanisms. Going to GRACE; that’s a coping mechanism because I’ve learnt a lot of things about anxiety and how to cope with anxiety. And different tools that you can use to cope with anxiety. Which I use and I did use. I’ll again bring up Louise Hay because a lot of these things when I read that book…like, the mirror work. Looking in the mirror and saying-Oh, you’re gorgeous. And making yourself feel gorgeous. And just being positive about yourself. I have my bad days. I won’t lie. I have my days when I’ve got to just stay in bed. And it’s Jordan that helps me cope. He’ll come in and he’ll say-‘If you need anything I’ll get it.’ and he’ll get me a cup of tea. And, if he sees that I’m sad he’ll say-‘Mum, do you want me to get you a writing pad and you can just sit and write?’ Which if you look over, I’ve got wee poems all over the place. I write poetry. So I cope…I like writing because I find it therapeutic. So, I can get into writing a story however daft it is; a children story or poetry. At the moment it seems to be a lot of poetry that’s coming to me. Or, reading a book. Just accepting today I just have to give in to it and I’ll read a book. That’s really…I can’t think of anything else that I do to cope.

- Agnes McEwan

I didn’t know where to look or where to go. It’s when I spoke to my GP and my GP diagnosed me with anxiety and stuff and it was…I think she referred me to somewhere. I can’t remember who it was but they phoned me up and then they mentioned GRACE and I came to GRACE. And the guy from the Citizen’s Advice put me on to the trauma counselling which I’m doing. So, that’s two things Grace and the trauma counselling. That’s a great place to start, you know. Because, I think it was round about August or September last year I came to GRACE. And at first I was being my usual self where I didn’t open up and I didn’t speak to people. But in GRA…Something happened in GRACE that I opened up very quickly. These are nice people. And it’s unusual for me that I said very quickly- No, I can talk to these people they’re ok, you know.

- Paul

I got myself a tutor when I came through and I stayed in Westermains Farm at the time. Because it was up at the library… That’s where I got myself a tutor. Well, before then I got myself a tutor when the kids were at nursery because I was more worried about for me to try and read their books and what have you. And I got…When Kat and Mark were at nursery; I got myself tutor then but that’s before I came up to come through to Kirkintilloch when I stayed in Clydebank. I got myself a tutor and that. And the school was quite good because they gave me likes of a book that Kat would start. I said to them that I wouldn’t pronounce the word…If I don’t think it’s right, I won’t pronounce it because I wouldn’t want to make the teacher’s job any harder. Because it wouldn’t be fair on them or my child at the time. Because they are going to say it the way that I think…And I’d rather the teacher tells them the correct way than me doing it wrong. And I can, kind of, not realise I’m kind of doing it or…if I get if right I get a wee boost because-oh, I got it right. You know, that was my wee kick if I got it right.

- Angela Duncan

I’ve always been arty, I’ve always been arty. That was one of my favourite subjects in school. And I think it’s…I’m very much a person… I’m very driven and, again, it’s not an ideal way to be to an extent, in that, I just always feel as if I need something to kind of work towards. Or, I suppose, have something to show. So like, I like doing art because I am working on something that like allows me to explore my creativity, but I also know I’m going to get a final, like a piece at the end to be proud of, and can be like, “Oh! I did that!”. And like, and I won’t lie, getting that praise does… is always good for your ego. And I have always been arty. Like I do like art but I don’t get to do it nearly as much as I would like. But, I mean, I’ve taken part in a good few of the art exhibition things with GRACE, and I still get a wee kick out of the fact that my artwork is in Auchinairn Community Centre, up on the wall, from like, from before Covid when I went to the Auchinairn one. And it’s… I like being busy, so I think, see being able to do something that’s not work, it’s not writing, it doesn’t really involve you really having to think like logically, but it keeps my hands busy. So, it’s not just art, I like colouring in, it’s something… I need something to keep my hands busy. I’m not one just to sit and do nothing. I need something to keep me busy, but it’s not something that’s boring or something that I don’t enjoy. I do love art. I do like to create things and I definitely like the more structured approach to it, so like, art’s a good therapy for me but it’s not something I’d go and do myself. So, like having that structure of, I’m going to that class every week, it helps me. Like, I’ll colour in, I’ll colour in, but I probably wouldn’t sit down every night and like, try and create something. it’s just not in my nature. I need something… I still need that wee bit of direction, I think.

- Dawn Smith

Well, I am a community artist. I graduated from Cumbria Institute of the Arts in 2005 with a fine art degree. And it became very clear throughout my degree that it was about process of making that I was more drawn to than the actual outcome of making. And I learned a huge amount and I explored concepts and so on. But I also realised that I wanted to work with people. I had come from working in the service industry as a youngster. And I loved that; working with people. And, you know, just, I like people. And combining those two things together, art and people, it was kind of inevitable that I was going to be either an educator or something else. And I wanted to do it on my own terms as well. So, yeah, I got my first experience of working in prisons the year that I graduated. And that was through Theatre Nemo who were…are a charity that focus on well-being in mental health. So, they…That was a big insight. And, of course, working in prisons…I had never done that before and it became very, very clear to me that the people that we worked with had experienced a huge amount of trauma in their lives. And that was the beginning of that journey of me helping through art to maybe address those things. But also, it’s used as a tool to enhance life…Sort of life skills. So that we don’t…build resilience. So, we can build resilience and, sort of, move away from, sort of, negative behaviour. So, but, the point I’m making there is that I think working in that setting really was an eye opener. But it was like a magical moment for me because I knew that the partnership between people, health and art genuinely worked and I knew I had a huge amount to offer that. So, that was that.

- Rachel Toner

Only final words are, through my lived experience of before GRACE and what I went through. What my life’s like now within GRACE is life changing. And I see other people whose life’s gone the exact same way. And I think that the vision for GRACE when it was very first started; was there to be a GRACE in every single community. And I’m still sticking to that whether it be in my lifetime or future generations. That I’d love to see; a GRACE in every single community.

- Robert Smith

We’re all Jock Tamson’s bairns. And everybody’s got their problems. And everybody needs help at some point in their life. Or most people do. And I wouldn’t say you’re unlucky to need help. Because then you realise that there are people there…If you never needed help you wouldn’t make friends with people necessarily or people that are there to…are willing to help you as well. Everybody needs something. GRACE is really good at that. Not judging people.

- Claire Taylor

Ricky A.Yeah, well, I’ve got a lot of support round me. So, that’s quite hopeful that way, you know. Well even my brother said-see if I didn’t have any financial help, he would make sure I would be ok, you know. And then but…my only issue is my eyes, again. If I could get them fixed I could start, more or less, a normal life.” “I think hopeful is being able to visit friends and family, you know. See my nephews. Because I’ve got three nephews and a niece.

- Ricky A